


What we do

by epsilonfive



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kissing, M/M, and be with sam ITS WHAT SAM DESERVES, gabriel needs to come back, oof
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 05:46:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15066482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epsilonfive/pseuds/epsilonfive
Summary: Gabriel returns post S13, as he should. You know the drill.





	What we do

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first ever sabriel fic ahhh! (and my first ever supernatural fic at all i think)
> 
> i just had to write something for this ship cause it's my favourite. i originally meant for this to be just a little ficlet but it got a little out of hand oops. enjoy! :)

Sam wasn’t sure just how long would be too long to hug someone, but Gabriel wasn’t pulling away, so Sam decided it was okay to keep holding tightly, despite an ache starting to make itself known in his neck.

“Great to see you too, Sammy,” Gabriel managed to say through a mouthful of flannel. “Nice to know you didn’t go off and get yourself killed again right after I’d saved your ass. It was for you, you know,”

“I know,” Sam murmured, tightening his grip around Gabriel to the point where if he wasn’t an archangel he’d probably be crushed.

Sam knew.

He’d known ever since Gabriel had said he wasn’t running any more. The look exchanged between them had said it all. It had made Sam’s heart ache not to reach out and grab a small arm, pulling Gabriel back towards them, but the latter seemed resolute in his decision.

Watching Gabriel die had torn at Sam’s guts like nothing else, but his built in hunter’s instinct left no time for grief; that would have to come later. He gathered the stragglers up and led them through, stopping as a rage swelled inside him.

He’d planned to abandon Lucifer here from the beginning, but now more than ever, he felt the strength to go through with it. They deserved each other, Lucifer and Michael. So Sam turned and placed a hand on Lucifer’s chest, preventing him from following. With a look that would kill a man if they could, he shoved the weakened Devil backwards before turning and leaping through the portal.

Sam had appeared at ease during their make shift party, but he wasn’t. Pain was clawing at his insides, as though trying to worm it’s way up his throat and out of his mouth, but he wouldn’t let it. At least not yet. When he’d found time to excuse himself, he’d made himself scarce before letting it out, teeth clamped on his sleeve to try to muffle the sounds of agony.

He’d realised, too late, that he was in love with Gabriel. He knew he’d always had a thing for him, way back when they’d first met, and through The Mystery Spot, despite the torment he’d been put through. He couldn’t help it; he was attracted to power and they both just... fit, somehow. He knew it was bad news to have a crush on a Trickster, but it happened anyway despite his internal protests.

Gabriel being an angel had thrown him for sure, and he felt extra sore for some reason about the whole deal, as though Gabriel lying to him was worse than it should be. And then he watched him die for the first time, and it had hurt. Not as much as it was going to the second time, but it was still devastating. Why did everyone he care about or feel romantic attachment to have to die? He felt like a walking curse.

Throughout the years he’d done his best to bury his feelings, only mentioning Gabriel here and there and distracting himself as much as he could from missing him. He felt like he’d just gotten a handle on it when Ketch had brought a disheveled Gabriel right into the bunker, torture evident in the form of blood and cuts and bruises and matted hair, and the sight cut right through Sam. Not only because he hated seeing Gabriel hurt like this, but because he knew what it was like, and he wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

He’d been gentle and patient with Gabriel, and eventually after a desperate speech, had awoken him. But just as Sam had rejoiced at the recovery, it shattered in an instant as Gabriel left. He wasn’t even angry, mostly disappointed. He hadn’t had enough time to appreciate having Gabriel back, hadn’t had enough time to hear his voice or roll his eyes at a sarcastic comment. It felt like every time he got a little bit closer to Gabriel, the latter pulled away and tugged on the connection until it was taut, close to breaking.

Eventually they’d ran into him again, wounded and in deep trouble as he usually seemed to be, and without question Sam stepped forward to patch his wound. So much as he quite liked being alive, he was actually partly grateful that they were interrupted by Slepnir and Narfi, because it meant Gabriel couldn’t just disappear like normal. On the contrary, it meant that he’d end up getting into a choke hold and Gabriel would come to save him. 

He’d always known Gabriel wasn’t one to enjoy fights, he preferred to manipulate things from the sidelines and while Sam didn’t agree with that, he could understand it. So to know that he would’ve been toast had it not been for Gabriel’s rescue was reassuring to say the least. Reassuring that Gabriel cared for him in some way too, at least in part. He felt a twinge of worry as Gabriel doubled over slightly in pain, still not recovered from his anxiety at seeing the vessel battered and tortured and bruised, but it seemed he would be alright. He kept a watchful eye on him as the story was told and what Gabriel had done in their time apart was revealed, Sam making sure to cut him off when he started talking in detail about porn stars - he was perfectly happy not to know too much about how he’d been missing Gabriel and thinking he was dead whereas the latter had just been having a blast getting laid thank you very much - before he’d decided he’d help on this little revenge spree.

Dean took some convincing. Some bargaining. Eventually he caved and Sam was glad to see that Dean mostly thought it was about revenge in general and how Sam could live through Gabriel in his desire to get his own back on Lucifer instead of his desire to help without anything in return. In the end he had to offer a deal because it was the only way to get Dean to agree.

After some interesting developments to say the least, which included a rogue brother and watching Gabriel kill someone who looked like his double, Gabriel, Dean and Sam had made their way outside to the Impala. Gabriel said something about helping to take down Michael which made Sam almost do a double take, looking at Gabriel with raised eyebrows as he tried not to let the bud of hope inside him flower. It seemed that finally, _finally_ , Gabriel had decided to stay.

If Sam knew then what he knew now, he would have never let that happen.

They hadn’t had much time alone which was a pity because Sam really wanted to just... _talk_ to Gabriel, maybe find out where the two of them stood, but there was no time for personal issues when they had to capture Lucifer and travel to the AU dimension in a limited amount of time.

Sam ended up dying there.

He accepted it when he felt the last moments of consciousness, but a Winchester never stays dead. So much as he wished he had when he found out who was responsible for revival, here he was again, and he fully intended to return to those he loved. A bone crushing hug from both Mary and Dean was what he expected, but not from Gabriel. Before he’d even reached the center of the camp, some tiny blur emerged and before he could gauge what it was, it had latched itself around him and buried its face into him. He looked down to see a nest of curls and a weary smile broke across his face. He could practically feel Lucifer’s gaze on them in the distance, but in that moment he didn’t care, arms wrapping around the small frame.

“Hey,” was all he managed to say softly before Gabriel released his grip and wandered off a ways, leaving a perplexed Sam in his wake. Sam turned in time to see a look on Dean’s face that suggested he was personally offended that he hadn’t been the first to welcome Sam back, and an unreadable expression on Mary’s.

Being on edge constantly was tiresome. While he had the plan in the back of his mind when it came to Lucifer, it didn’t stop the tension with him and the distasteful leaping of his heart whenever he heard the voice that had taunted him for so long. He forced himself to keep going with the thought that he’d get rid of Lucifer for good giving him the strength to put one foot in front of the other.

And then it had happened.

Gabriel had died for Sam. 

And Sam had known.

He had been too late in realising that his feelings for Gabriel went far deeper than a simple crush, and at the time, he thought there’d been nothing he could do about it.

He kept up the facade as long as he could, with occasional breaks to himself for rest, where he let himself feel it for a few minutes before sucking it up and heading back out again. Thankfully he now had his own room, which meant he wouldn’t wake Dean with the constant nightmares.

He didn’t have time to grieve properly. At least not yet. 

Of course when he’d thought himself free of Lucifer, the bastard had to reappear and try to take Jack, who Sam had started to see as a sort of surrogate son, and in the end, the kid chose for himself not to fall in with such a cruel, manipulative creature. All hell broke loose, then.

Sam almost lost Jack.

Dean arrived, the power of Michael shining through as he spread his wings, the shadow of them painting the walls as his eyes blazed a brilliant blue. 

The fight happened so fast Sam barely had time to keep up, but in a critical moment, he spied the archangel blade, handed it to Dean and watched as it was plunged into Lucifer’s chest.

The elation was short lived, however, because then.

Then he lost Dean.

Returning to the bunker had been silent. Everyone had been evacuated before Michael had broken in, so Sam and Jack didn’t have to talk to people, didn’t have to answer questions about what had happened, didn’t have to explain why they had returned and Dean hadn’t.

So much loss. And still Sam kept it inside.

Whether it was for Jack and Cas’ sake or his own, he didn’t know. All he knew was that if he let himself feel it, it would be over. If he let himself go, he wouldn’t be able to stop. He spared a glance at Cas before tearing his gaze away almost immediately, the look on his face unbearable to witness.

Mary and Bobby decided to unhelpfully rush in at that point, looking to Cas who looked at them for a moment and away. Their eyes flicked to Sam who probably looked as crappy as he felt. He knew they had questions, questions he could answer, but he didn’t know if he even had the strength to speak. Jack moved in to save the day, looking worn down but determined to spare Sam of any more pain, giving Sam the opportunity to slip away to his room quietly.

He wasn’t particularly known to be loud mouthed, but he had never been as quiet as he was now, forcing himself to eat and drink and move around the bunker as much as he could, knowing the last thing he could do was sit in bed all day. He tried to keep a brave face for the others, but his mask had been chipped away so thoroughly he couldn’t find it in him any more. People mostly avoided him, obviously unsure what to say or do, occasionally only greeting him or updating him on anything concerning tracking Michael.

Mary knew her son was suffering, but she also knew that sometimes words weren’t enough. She made sure he ate, let him rest his head on her shoulder when it felt too heavy to carry on his own and whispered words of encouragement with a sense of calm that only a mother could bring. Jack had started to get antsy and it gained Sam’s attention, but it also seemed that out of respect the kid held himself back. Sam was thoroughly grateful.

All the days of such deep sorrow had led up to this moment, the moment where Sam was holding Gabriel in his arms again, the moment where Gabriel was _alive_ and _breathing_ and still smelled like cotton candy, which was now one of Sam’s most favourite scents in the world.

“Are you ever gonna let go of me?” Gabriel said with a slight nervous laugh at the edge of his voice, but he made no move to pull away.

“Just a little more. Please,” Sam said quietly, his voice almost breaking.

Gabriel tightened his grip.

Thankfully Gabriel had chosen to return at night, while everyone was asleep. Everyone save for Sam, who had trouble sleeping these days. An interruption sounded like the worst possible thing at the moment, so Sam was glad of an excuse to let himself feel something good for a change, to feel like he’d actually gotten a win among all this suffering.

When they finally pulled apart, they didn’t say anything.

Sam just leaned in slowly and kissed Gabriel gently, hands coming up to hold his precious face as he pressed himself against Gabriel as if to absorb his warmth, causing Gabriel to lose his balance slightly and end up against the door frame. Small hands reached up to thread their way through Sam’s hair, drawing a soft sound of appreciation from him as they lost themselves in each other.

It was hard to tell just exactly they had stood there, kissing and kissing like they were making up for all the times they could’ve been in the past, but eventually, unfortunately, Sam needed to breathe. They panted slightly as they broke apart, Sam feeling Gabriel’s warm breath on his wet lips before he stepped back a little gingerly, one of his hands which had fallen to Gabriel’s side sliding down to drop from it.

“Well damn kiddo, if that’s the kind of reception I get I wanna die and come back all the time,” Sam stared at him, causing Gabriel to wince slightly. “Too soon?”

Sam didn’t find it in him to be annoyed, instead settling with a deep sigh and a roll of the eyes.

“How--?”

“Long story. And it’d be better if I told it while I bring the friends I’ve got with me inside,”

Sam’s eyes widened.

“Friends...?”

“Yeah. Didn’t think I’d come alone, did you?”

“Uh...”

“Other angels, Sammy boy. They’re waiting outside. Good thing most of them sit and stay when an archangel is around, I don’t think you guys would be too happy if a load of ‘em just bust in,”

“Other... angels? How many?”

“A few. Enough. Look, it’s late and I don’t think it’s a good idea to pack this place with angels and have people start freaking out when it’s morning and there’s just these random douchebags wandering around,”

“So what are you gonna do?”

“Figured I’d see you first. I was even considering saying hey to Dean-o. Where is he, anyway?”

“That’s a long story too. I was planning on explaining it all to everyone in the morning. You’ll be there, right?”

“I should probably take care of the little ones, you know how they like to know what to do,”

“I guess,”

Sam’s heart sank at that. Finally he had Gabriel here, finally Gabriel knew how he felt and it seemed to be reciprocated. And now he had to watch him leave all over again?

“No,” He added at the last minute.

“No?”

“No. You’re staying here. Don’t make me get the cuffs,”

“Kinky. Alright Sam, alright. I’ll stay. Just lemme go and... I dunno get ‘em somewhere safe for now,”

“And then you’ll come back?” Sam couldn’t help the doubt in his voice, the worry in his eyes.

Gabriel reached up and placed a hand on Sam’s face, thumbing the soft skin there and Sam closed his eyes.

“I promise,”

Sam opened them again to look at Gabriel, and for some reason, this time he believed him.

“Okay. Hurry back, alright?”

“You got it, lover boy. I’ll be back before you can say ‘raspberry doughnut’,”

Sam grinned at that, the expression feeling foreign on his own face as Gabriel started making his way down the hall.

“Don’t you dare die again, or I swear to God I’ll come to the Empty and bring you back myself,” He called as quietly as he could while still being able to grab Gabriel's attention.

Gabriel turned, a playful expression on his face.

“That’s breaking pretty much every rule in the universe. You know that right?”

“I’m a Winchester,” Sam replied with a sideways smile and a half shrug. “Breaking every rule in the universe is what we do.”


End file.
